Enneagram Type Two and Enneagram Type Nine are very similar, and it can be hard to tell them apart at first glance. Twos are a Heart type, and desire above all else to be important to someone else in order to receive their validation. Nines are a Body type, and are mainly concerned with independence, which they achieve by not creating trouble with others and by not letting others trouble them.

The main source of similarity is the fact that both Twos and Nines tend to be likeable, positive, nurturing and motherly toward others. Twos shower the object of their desire with attentions to the point that all but the most hardened thugs fall for their advances. Nines are extremely friendly and easily get along with others, often letting them express themselves and their gifts, but they don’t necessarily relentlessly pursue others to fulfill an emotional need.

This is, however, also where the two types diverge. Twos are extremely specific in the way they take care of someone, while Nines almost operate under a generic ‘good neighbors’ policy with most people. When describing both types, the word ‘merging‘ gets thrown around a lot, but Twos are very picky with the people they want to merge with, and their aim for merging is to have their self-worth mirrored to them by someone they consider suitable, while Nines tend to dissipate their own personal energy and to vaguely merge with the world at large, with the aim of not being bothered.

Both types tend to have a hard time expressing their own wants and needs. Twos often subconsciously projects them onto others (“Are you hungry?” usually means “I’m hungry”) because they feel the only way for them to get their needs met is to meet those of another person. Nines, on the other hand, often find it hard to find their own center as individuals with well-defined agenda and set of goals.

In this respect, Twos are much more intense and demanding than Nines, who in turn are much harder to pin down and grasp. Twos have an inflated sense of self (though they probably don’t think they do), while Nines are self-effacing and consider themselves regular folks. Furthermore, frustrated Twos who feel they are failing in achieving the kind of connection they crave with someone may resort to underhanded tactics of active manipulation, whereas Nines rarely manipulate others actively. If anything, Nines usually oppose a passive resistance to other people’s agendas, making them waste time and effort until they give up and everything becomes calm and serene again.

MQS